Penny Wise, Pound Foolish

Today, I heard a very sad story about a start-up that was trying to save money. The principals were non-native English speakers. They decided to do without anyone's help in writing an introductory letter to a potential strategic partner. They got a Dear John form letter instead of the appointment they wanted. Why? Because they wrote to a Christian outlet about the New Testimony instead of the New Testament.

Everything with your signature on it is a reflection of you.

Whether you’re sending a thank you note or a proposal to the EEC, the way it is written will say whether you are trustworthy, credible, considerate, thorough, and careful – or not.

Who checks your writing before it goes out?

Do you leave that job to the printer who makes you sign that you’ve checked it? Do you give it to your secretary whose favorite reading material is Cosmo? Do you ask the tech writer to look it over – after all, his experience should qualify him to check what you wrote on that prospectus, shouldn’t it? Or, do you just wing it and hope for the best?

No one to turn to?

Sometimes there really is no one close by to turn to. No one to make sure that you’ve said what you intended to say... In the tone you intended... In the appropriate format… Sometimes you’re working on something confidential that can’t be known within the company. Sometimes…

But why beat a dead horse? You know the problem all too well. To get your writing checked, you have to hunt all over the office to find someone whose expertise you actually trust and then you have to ask for a favor. It’s time-consuming. And a little humiliating. But what choice do you have? Let your customers or Board of Directors or colleagues see you at less than your best?

Do yourself a favor. If your signature or the name of your company is on material about to make its way into the world, get a qualified reviewer to look it over BEFORE it leaves the premises. It may even cost you a little. But better to put your hand in your pocket than your foot in your mouth.

Written English as a Second Language? Fuggedaboutit!

This is controversial. The education gurus will probably come down hard on me. I'm sure to get a lot of flak for what I have to say here. Nonetheless, I think that people who try to write in a language that isn't their mother tongue are wasting their time.

Why? Because most of them will never be good enough. That's why.

Yes, some might get by. There might even be the occasional Vladimir Nabokov who can write brilliantly in a second language.

But let's get real. The vast majority of people who start learning a second language in high school and don't actually use it full time will never master it. They'll be able to manage in conversations by using body language and facial expressions. Their friends will forgive their clumsy phrasing. Even business associates will make allowances for their gaffes because their accents will make it clear that their mistakes are not the result of stupidity.

But writing is another story altogether. If the reader doesn't know the writer's circumstances, there are no clues to explain the mangled metaphors, the grammar mistakes, the awkward sentence structures. And anonymous readers aren't so forgiving.

Recently, the billionaire, Malcolm Forbes, made a very important point in an interview. He said that he always hired people to do things that they could do better than he could. Why? Well, for one, he would get a better result. And meanwhile, he would be able to devote his time to doing what he is best at.

And that's exactly how I think people should treat writing in a second language.

Now let's say that you're not a native speaker of English. And let's say that you have to prepare a PowerPoint presentation for a speech you're going to give in English. Ask yourself, what would Malcolm Forbes do in your place? Would he spend hours writing his speech with a dictionary, a thesaurus and a copy of a book on grammar? I highly doubt it.

And would he let his secretary handle it for him? No again! After all, his philosophy is to use the person who can do the job best in order to get the best result.

Here's what I recommend to people in that situation. Do a brief outline of your presentation and then hand over the preparation of the final product to a native English writer. Review the result to make sure that it says what you want it to say and that you're comfortable with the vocabulary. The result? A polished product that makes you look good and that is more convincing than if you did it all yourself.

Of course, you can't hand off the actual speaking part to someone else, so it makes sense to take lessons in the target vocabulary that will likely be needed. If you know the right buzz words and can use them correctly, then any grammar mistakes you make in person will be forgiven.

You'll be more relaxed. Your slides won't jar people with grammatical errors and will let them focus on what you're saying. And your audience may actually understand you—assuming, of course, that you're topic suits the audience.

So put you're efforts into learning to speak English and let someone else do the English writing. Otherwise, you're just wasting your time.